The rhetoric of Boyd K. Packer this year was needlessly caustic. And while he may have never mentioned the words, "gay", "homosexual" or even the insidious phrase "same-sex-attraction", we all know what he was talking about. We all know of his utter disdain for those that don't fit into his idealistic notion of gender, patriarchy and willful ignorance of the world at large.
Boyd K. Packer is just one of many I hold responsible for the damage done to the souls of gay individuals, young and old, in and out of the church. Such damage that I still grapple with from time to time.
Boyd K. Packer is the one I personally hold responsible for the encouragement of physical violence towards gay individuals, young and old, in and out of the church. Such threats that I personally experienced and still find difficult to process. Let us NOT forget that one of Mathew Sheppard's murderers was a Mormon.
Boyd K. Packer is just one of many who, when he speaks, will incite fear, hatred and malice towards the LGBT community. The many who I hold responsible are the church members who say 'Amen' with enthusiastic unison to Packer's hostile words.
If, in some small way, I can save one soul from the anathema that is religion, Mormon or otherwise, my life will not have been a complete waste. I honestly don't know how I'm going to do that, but it's ok. At least I managed to save myself for I am one of the lucky ones who found the self-awareness to understand my responsibility. But many people aren't as fortunate, and many may never get to that point in their lives where they can learn how to repair the damage inflicted upon them, because many of them will have died by their own hand before they could get the support they desperately needed.
Mormons often wonder why those that leave the church can't leave the church alone. So they feel picked on by us angry, gay, ex/post-Mormons. But, I don't care. I am a product of that religion and culture, 40+ years in the making; it has permeated my DNA and it's not something I feel like I'm ever going to get over in my short lifetime. Besides, they are the ones who can't leave US alone. So, if the Mormon church is not willing to take responsibility for Boyd K. Packer, the damage he and many others have done and still do to the LGBT community, but instead continue to blame the victim or Satan, I'm going to continue to poke at their abhorrent hypocrisy, which could very well mean I may never leave them alone.
I've managed to not hand in my resignation out of respect/fear/concern for my family's feelings. But if Packer ever makes it to being prophet I doubt I'll last a day.
ReplyDeleteI finally said something about BKP on my blog. The man's a psychopath. His existence is an insult to good people everywhere, whatever their religion. The Mormon church is doing itself a huge disservice by keeping him in the fold.
ReplyDeletePS: I left the church.
@Molly,
ReplyDeleteI can understand the respect/fear/concern for family in that regard. But when push comes to shove there is a breaking point. Mine happened in early June of 2008 when the church was gearing up to support Prop 8.
@C.J.,
Congratulations! Is it still to soon to officially join the Outer Bloggness realm yet? It feels like you hit a breaking point too. I would love to hear your story sometime, when you're ready to tell it.
I did. It started with people I loved telling me that it was OK for my BIL to assault me because he had the priesthood and I didn't. I posted a little bit about it on Molly's blog. As far as the full story, right now, it's email-only. Eventually, some day, I hope I have the courage to blog about it.
ReplyDeleteI've read a little about Packer's past statements, and he sounds thoroughly repugnant.
ReplyDeleteAh-men. I agree - showing the world the truth about Mormonism in particular and saving even one person is a worthy endeavor.
ReplyDeleteGreat writing.
I'm so sorry about all of this. I didn't (and don't) listen to conference because I don't believe that any of them are inspired by God--just remember that--GOD would NEVER, never think or say anything like that.
ReplyDeleteDid you read the article in the Salt Lake Tribune describing how the church changed the wording of his speech. Could it be that they wanted to minimize his self-imposed foolishness as much as possible?
ReplyDelete@shawn,
ReplyDeleteI read it and I reviewed the changes. Yeah they are trying to minimize the foolishness but their so-called softer rhetoric is not much different in my opinion. Quite frankly, I don't think it will matter all that much what they say to try and deflect the negativity away from them.
Their call for civility on all of this just goes to show they have no concept of what they are doing. That are completely at a loss to understand the role they play in all of this.
And then there is that pesky, 'it is better one die than be lost in the sin of homosexuality' attitude that still runs deep in the culture of the church that I get the sense that they are secretly happy with themselves for each suicide that takes place. After all, that suicide has supposedly saved them from the worst sin of all. etc. blah blah blah.
One of these days I'll be over this. I just don't know how or when.
@Ahab, Packer is mild compared to Spencer W. Kimball's hell fire damnation writings about homosexuality in his infamous book "The Miracle of Forgiveness".
ReplyDelete@sideon, Thanks.
@Stella, So true. If there was a god, or at least, if I created a god in my mind, he/she/it would NEVER say anything like that or tell anyone what to do, including me.